Captioning Archives 

    July 8th, 2003
    

    

    Hermione: "Ron......I got your note."

    Ron: "You   did?!"

    Hermione: "And it's.....yes, Ron, I do love you   too."

    --pheonixqueen121
    

    Ron: "...And that's the whole truth, even though I just met you on   the train, I know that I abosolutly LOVE you."

    Hermione: "Yes, well... that's   nice Ron, BUT YOU COULD'VE AT LEAST WAITED UNTIL OUR SEVENTH YEAR TO CONFESS   YOUR LOVE TO ME!"

    Ron: "I wanted to prevent the Yule Ball   incident..."

    Hermione: "Honestly, when will you learn, in four years I only   go with Viktor to make you jealous!"

    Ron: "OHH! I GET IT NOW!"

    --Natalie   Potter
    

    Hermione: "Ron, is it my imagination or did Harry catch us in the   broom closet making out?" Ron: "I guess so, otherwise I don't think a picture of   us snogging would be in the Daily Prophet." --pheonixqueen121
    

    Hermione: "Don't tell me you saw that Prisoner of Azakaban set pic of   me and Harry, too, did you, Ron?"

    Ron: "Yeah, and I about threw   up!"

    Hermione: "I know! Don't they know Harry and I are JUST FRIENDS?   Sheesh!"

    --dutchtulips
    

    Hermione: *gasp* "Oh no! Ron, we left our books you-know-where when   we you-know-what!"

    Ron: *gulp* "Don't panic."

    Hermione: "What do we   do?"

    Ron: "Hurry, look innocent! Maybe we could sneak out of this crowd and   get back there."

    Hermione: "Okay."

    Ron: "Oh, and maybe we could, ahem, go   for another round?"

    Hermione: "Oh, not now Ron!"

    Ron: "C'mon, just a   couple of seconds!"

    Hermione: "You know how carried away I can get! It's too   risky."

    Ron: "That's why I love you, my dear."

    --Nina
    

    Ron: "I wonder if we're in captioning this week."

    Hermione: "It   looks like we are..." *looks at captions*

    Ron: "Hermione! Don't make it look   obvious that we're curious!"

    Hermione: *looks back down* "I wonder what   they're writing about us..."

    Ron: "I don't know. Nothing else goes on in   their mind except that we love each other."

    Hermione: "Well, we do,   Ron..."

    *both blushes*

    --Silver Storm
    

    Hermione: (Thinking) "Just tell him. The worst that can happen is   he'll say no. All that will happen is that you'll die alone and friendless...   just ask him out..."

    Ron: "Hermione?"

    Hermione: (Still thinking) "Can it   be? Can it be he'll finally ask me out and make all my dreams a   reality?"

    Hermione: "Yes, Ron?"

    Ron: "Are you going to finish that   sausage?"

    --Kat097
    

    HERMIONE: "Ron, don't move... there's a spider... don't worry, I'll   kill it."

    NEVILLE: "Jeez, can't the man kill his own spider?"

    RON: "Not   really."

    --Bill
    

    Hermione: "This is where the trouble begins..."

    Ron: *thinking*   Hmm... God, she's hot..."

    Hermione: "I still can't tell you..."

    Ron:   *snaps out of it* "Tell me what?"

    Hermione: *freezes* "That I... oh, for the   love of God, I'm... in love with someone..."

    on: *notices tension in air and   feels uneasy* "Umm... well, hey! Food! Let's go! *runs off*

    Hermione:   "Phooey, I STILL can't do it... Guess I'll need the love potion   again...."

    --Dragonflare
    

    July 28th, 2003
    

    

    Hermione: "Um, Ron, I need you to help me with something."

    Ron:   "What thing?"

    Hermione: "A thing..." *nods towards the door*

    Ron:   "Wha..?"

    Hermione: "Some thing I TOLD you about yesterday?"

    Ron:   "Oooohhh......that thing." *smirks*

    Harry: "What are you talking   about?"

    *Ron and Hermione look at each other, then at Harry and suddenly run   for it*

    Harry: "Ooooh.....that thing....." *mumbles* "Astronomy   Tower."

    --Hermweasley
    

    Hermione: "What are you doing?"

    Ron: "We're playing Wizard's   Chess."

    Hermione: "Oh. Who's winnning?"

    Harry: "I'll have won, as soon as   I capture Ron's king."

    Hermione: "Sorry, Harry. Weasley is my king."

    Ron:   "Hey! That could be a song!"

    --Drew
    

    Hermione: (to Ron) "You can help Harry, then. You can look in the   library for information on Nicholas Flamel."

    Ron: "We've looked a thousand   times!"

    Hermione: "Not in the Restricted Section..."

    Ron: "You mean that   place where we snogged last week?"

    Hermione: "RON!"

    (Harry   snickers)

    --dutchtulips
    

    Hermione: *thinking* "Ok, Harry, you're better at dueling than us, so   you go find out what Malfoy is up to. I want to try playing wizard chess   anyway."

    Hermione: (at the same time as her thought) "Ok, Harry you go away   so that me and Ron can make... uh..."

    Hermione: *thinking* "Oh, shoot, I said   the thought and thought the lie. Now I'm in trouble!"

    Hermione: "Gotta go,   see ya!"

    (Hermione leaves)

    Harry: "What was she talking about?"

    Ron:   *blushing* "Uh, I dunno..."

    --Daniel
    

    Hermione: "Er.... It's Christmas and er...... Ron...... um   I...."

    Harry: "Hermione, are you OK?"

    Ron: "Yah, you look   pale."

    Hermione: "Yes, I'm fine, except for....."

    Harry:   "What?"

    Hermione: "Ron, I er...."

    Ron: "Harry, let's take her to the   hospital wing."

    Hermione: (quickly) "NO! I just have to go to the library to   look for love, I mean doves. Yah, that it, doves."

    --Kaitlin
    

    HARRY: "Ron, when are you going to tell Hermione about your feelings   for her?"

    RON: "Harry, I just can't do it!"

    HARRY: "Why, because you're   afraid of what she'll say?"

    RON: "No, because she's right behind you and just   heard everything you just said!"

    HERMIONE: "It's ok, Ron. It's about time one   of you said it. By the way, I love you, too."

    --Kristen
    

    HERMIONE: "Ron, we need to talk."

    RON: "What about,   where?"

    HERMIONE: "Not here. My room."

    RON: "Hermione, the stairs won't   let me into your dormitory."

    HERMIONE: "Oh right. The Shrieking Shack   then."

    RON: "Okay."

    HARRY: "How come we don't need to talk?"

    HERMIONE:   "Because you and I are not involved."

    --Bill
    

    Ron: "But we made out a hundred times!"

    Hermione: "Not in the   restricted section."

    --Pheonixqueen121
    

    Hermione: "You know, Harry, it's impossible to beat Ron at   chess."

    Harry: "Hermione, shut up, you're distracting me!"

    Hermione: "Yes,   Ron is simply amazing at chess, it's one of his best qualities."

    Ron: "Are   you trying to get at something, Hermione?"

    Hermione: *blushing* "No, why do   you think that?"

    Harry: *sighs* "The two of you can be so ridiculous   sometimes."

    --XtracrunchyAnn
    

    Hermione: *looks very embarrassed about something*   "R-R-Ron...?"

    Ron: "Yes, Hermione?"

    Hermione: "Y-You... um... you er- left   your er..... left your er- bookbag...in the place where we, erm... where we were   um..." *looks nervously around at Harry*

    Harry: "Hermione, I already know   about you two snogging in front of Filch's office a couple of hours ago.   Actually the whole school knows, now that you mention it." *Grins   Broadly*

    *R/H look at each other and blush furiously*

    --Cheese Diva
    

    Harry: "So Hermione, what is it between you and Ron?"

    Hermione:   "Do you want to tell him Ron or should I?"

    Ron: "Well Harry... you should   know by now. Hermy and I are going steady."

    Hermione: "I thought you knew.   Ron, don't call me Hermy!"

    Ron: "Yes, dear."

    Harry: "I figured as much.   After I found you in the broom closet everything became clear."

    --Ellie
    

    Ron: "Hey, Hermione! What's up?"

    Hermione: "I just wanted to make   sure you didn't forget.... our plans for this evening." *winks*

    Harry: "What   plans, you guys?"

    Ron: "It's nothing."

    Harry: "Come on guys, tell   me."

    [Ron secretly imagining about their plans]

    Hermione: "Harry, there is   no point in you knowing....." [smiles secretly at Ron]

    --just another girl
    

    Hermione: "Psst...Ron..."

    Ron: "Huh?"

    Hermione: "Do you want to   go 'study' later on tonight?"

    Ron: (thinking) "Jackpot!" (says to Hermione)   "Not a bad idea... I'll 'study' with you tonight!" *winks*

    Harry: (thinking)   "Do they think I am dense?"

    --Fredina and Georgetta
    

    Harry: *cynically* "Go ahead, Hermione, just ignore me, pretend I   don't exist."

    Hermione: "Why would you think such a thing, Harry?"

    Harry:   "That's because you've been looking all the time at SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, while I   was talking to you!"

    *Hermione blushes*

    Ron: *ignorant* "What? 'Mione's   been looking at who? Where?"

    *Harry rolls his eyes, while Hermione pretends   to be looking at her books*

    --Anggita
    

    Hermione: "Do you think they know what we were doing in that   closet?!"

    Ron: "Want to go back?"

    Hermione: *smiles* "Yeah, let's   go."

    --Mugglebornwicth2
    

    August 11th, 2003
    

    

    

    Harry: "What's that, Ron?"

    Ron: *thinking to himself* "I TOLD   Hermione not to send me love letters!" *blushes*

    --Winkie
    

    Harry: "What's that, Ron?",br> Ron: *thinking* "Bloody hell, it's   a pic of me and 'Mione snogging in the Astronomy Tower! Who's been taking this   while we were..." *turns at Harry, then stutters* "N-n-nothing, Harry! It's   nothing at all! Oh, look at the time, we better hurry!"

    --Anggita
    

    Ron: "Oh no!It's a howler...from Dad!"

    Hermione: "Well, open   it."

    Ron: "Uh, no, maybe later."

    Harry: "Oh, c'mon, what's Daddy got to   say that's so bad?"

    *Harry takes the howler from Ron*

    Ron: "No, Harry,   don't!!!"

    *Harry opens the letter and Mr. Weasley's voice projects through   the whole Great Hall*

    Mr. Weasley: "DEAR RON, NOW I REALIZE YOU'RE GROWING UP   AND EXPERIENCING... 'NEW' FEELINGS.... YOU KNOW, WITH A CERTAIN SOMEONE. AND   IT'S OKAY, EVERYONE GOES THROUGH IT...IT'S CALLED...."

    Ron: *Drowning out Mr.   Weasley's voice* "NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!"

    Harry: "Whoops!" *clears throat* "I   think I'll leave you here to, uh, continue your father-son talk... eh heh...   BYE!"

    *Harry speeds off out of the hall, Ron running after him*

    --Nina
    

    Harry: "OOOOH! it's a letter from Hermione-"

    (Ron makes funny   face)

    Harry: " -'s Mum! Hahahaha! You are in such big trouble!"

    Ron: "What   how did you - Hey! Wait a minute, how did she know... about my soging mine in   astry twer?"

    Harry: "What did you say, Ron?" Ron: "HOW DID SHE KNOW ABOUT MY   SNOGGING HERMIONE IN THE ASTRONOMY TOWER?"

    Harry: "Um......."

    Girl on the   other side of Ron: "Well, it's quite obvious, because Harry saw the two of you,   and he told the rest of us at dinner last night, because two nights ago was when   it happened, after all."

    Ron: "HARRY!!!!!!!!!!"

    (Harry runs away as fast   as possible)

    --Amber
    

    Harry: "What's that you got there, Ron?"

    Ron: "Harry, this here is   a Howler, the worst letter anyone can get. You open it, and out comes the voice   of whoever sent it to you. It's terrifying and humiliating! But you have to open   it, or it bursts into flames."

    Harry: "I guess you'd better open it,   then."

    *Ron opens letter*

    Harry: "By the way, where's Hermione?"

    Voice   of Hermione: "RON WEASLEY! WHERE WERE YOU LAST NIGHT?!?!!?!?!?!! I TOLD YOU TO   BE AT THE ASTRONOMY TOWER AT TEN O'CLOCK SHARP, AND YOU NEVER SHOWED UP! I   THOUGHT YOU WERE SERIOUS ABOUT THIS RELATIONSHIP. IF YOU DON'T SHOW UP TONIGHT,   I SWEAR WITH MERLIN AS MY WITNESS THAT I WILL PERSONALLY BREAK EVERY BONE IN   YOUR BODY!!!"

    Harry: "So that's where she was. Yeah, mate, you're   doomed."

    --Kristen
    

    Harry: "What's that?"

    Ron: "A singing valentine, I thought we were   gonna give these later, 'Mione!!!

    --Becky
    

    Harry: "Ron... What is that?"

    Ron: "Uh...It's nothing..."   *blushes*

    Harry: *reads* " 'To my Dearest Ronniekins...Love Mione?!' "   *thinking* "It's about bloody time..."

    Ron: "Well...I'd best be   leaving..."

    Harry: *pushes Ron down* "You're not going anywhere, loverboy.   Read it."

    Ron: *opens up the letter* "What the----?!"

    Hermione: "Ron!"   *kisses him*

    Ron: "Heh...TAKE THAT H/H-ers!"

    --MiNi Weasley
    

    Ron: "I found more of that stupid H/Hr evidence, Harry, Isn't it   sickening?"

    Harry: "Very. Escpecially the part about me in love with Hermione   just because I used the quill she gave me."

    Ron: "Sheesh. You'd think by now   that those Pumpkin Pie people would be able to see that I'm the one in   love with Hermione, for Heaven's sake."

    Harry: "Indeed, mate.   Indeed!"

    --dutchtulips
    

    *Ron looks at letter that is from Hermione and opens it and starts to   read*

    Harry: *whispering to Colin* "Ok Colin, take the picture on three...   ready?... THREE!"

    *camera goes off and Colin quickly puts the picture of the   letter and straps it on Hedwig to bring to the Daily Prophet, before ron even   notices* Ron: "Uhhh, I got to see Hermione. Excuse me."

    Harry: *looks at the   reprint of the photo of the letter and whispers to Colin* "Okay, so they're   meeting in the library? Good, maybe we'll get a picture of them   snogging."

    --Pheonixqueen121
    

    Harry: "Ron, who's that howler from?"

    Ron: *nervously* "Erm...   well, it's from my mum..."

    Harry: *laughs* "You haven't been flying in your   dad's car again, have you?"

    Ron: "No! My mum just thinks I'm too young." *Ron   casts a quick glance at Hermione entering the Great Hall* Ron: "She found out   about, erm, me and um..." *looks at Hermione again and rapidly gets up and runs   before anyone hears the Howler explode*

    --Cecilia
    

    Ron: "I don't believe it, I specifically asked that they use gold   writing on me and Hermione's wedding invitations!" --Caitlin
    

    Ron: "Oh no, what did I do to deserve a Howler?!"

    Harry: "I bet I   know..."

    *Ron opens the Howler and it jumps into the air* Voice of Mrs.   Weasley: "Ronald Weasley! How dare you not tell Hermione your feelings for her!   I'm tired of this! If you don't tell her, I will!"

    Ron: "Oh, Mom!"

    Harry:   "Ha! I knew it!"

    --Daniel
    

    Harry: "Ron, that's a howler... from your mum."

    Ron: "No, er...   actually it's from Hermione."

    Harry: "What's Hermione doing sending you a   howler?"

    Ron: "I don't... AHHH!" (howler bursts into flames)

    Howler:   (Hermione's Voice) "RON! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU! HOW COULD YOU BE SO BLIND! VIKTOR   AND I ARE NOT GOING OUT! I DON'T LIKE HIM!"

    Harry: "Nevermind, I get it   now."

    Ron: "Well, that's just great, I just sent Viktor a howler for taking   my girl."

    --Natalie Potter
    

    *Errol drops off the love letter from Hermione* Harry: "Ron, what's   that?"

    Ron: "N-nothing..." *blushes and goes into the hall* Harry: "God, does   Ron think I'm stupid?! But hey, at least I get his chips." *smiles and steals   Ron's chips*

    --Pheonixqueen121
    

    August 19th, 2003
    

    
    

    Hermione: "I hate this! The new director pretended to be an   Ron/Hermione shipper so he could get the job when we all know he's a   Harry/Hermione shipper! If only we'd found out before he got the job! Now he   says he'll use Avada Kedavra on us all if we tell!"

    Harry: "I know - but   wait! Look up there! It's Chris Columbus here to save us from the clutches of   evilness!"

    *Chris Columbus flies down from the sky like Superman and throws   the other director into the lake and Hermione runs over to Ron*

    --Gillian
    

    HARRY: "Hermione, have you seen my Spider-Man action   figure?"

    HERMIONE: "No."

    HARRY: "Come on, you've got to know where it is,   you know everything."

    HERMIONE: "Harry, I haven't seen your Spider-Man toy."   [Hermione walks away; Harry grabs her]

    HARRY: "Damn it girl, you have to   know!" [Ron walks by and sees them and his mouth drops]

    RON:   "Hermione!"

    HERMIONE: "Ron?!"

    HARRY: "Ron?!"

    RON: [looking heartbroken   and devastated] "So the rumors were true about you two after all!"

    HERMIONE:   "Ron, please, calm down! Let me explain!"

    HARRY: "Ron, this is NOT what it   looks like!"

    RON: "Oh isn't it?! I thought you were different Hermione, but   you're just like all the others! In the end, you always go for the title   character! I knew JK would do this to me, I knew it! Damn!" [Ron stalks   away]

    HARRY: "Where are you going?"

    RON: "I'm gonna go see if Luna   Lovegood is doing anything on Saturday!"

    HERMIONE: "What?! That screwball?!   No!" [Hermione stomps on Harry's foot and runs after Ron]

    --Bill
    

    Harry: "Hermione you musn't take your anger out on Ron."

    Hermione:   "But he makes me so mad sometimes."

    Harry: (Thinking) "Ah! young   love!"

    Harry: "You should take it out on the ship of us!"

    Hermione: "Good   idea, they are going to go nuts when they see this picture of us and say its   more evidence for H/Hr, anyways."

    Harry: "Aha! so you admit it you love   Ron!"

    --Amber
    

    Hermione: "Harry, make it stop!"

    Harry: "I wish I could, 'Mione,   but the Pumpkin Pie-ers are persistant."

    Hermione: "I wish Ron was here... I   think I'm gunna be sick..."

    Harry: "Yeah the H/Hr evidence makes me feel   queasy too."

    --Padfoot
    

    Harry: (mumbling to himself) "Lord, oh, Lord, why is Alfonso making   me hug Hermione? This is NOT my job!"

    Hermione: "That's right, it's   Ron's!"

    --dutchtulips
    

    (Ron is dragged past the Whomping Willow and his leg   breaks)

    Hermione: (crying) "Ron!!!" (Tries to get to Ron)

    Harry: "You can   get hurt! Please don't go!"

    Hermione: "Do you think that I will let my love   die?!"

    Harry: "Your love???"

    Hermione: "Where have you   been???"

    --GryffindorStar77
    

    Hermione: "Ron! Ron! Where are you, Ron?"

    Harry: "AHH   DEMNETORS!!!!"

    Hermione: "Harry? Let me go! I wanna see where Ron   is!"

    Harry: "Ahhh, Hermione! What are you doing here?! Ewww!" (gets away from   Hermione)

    *Both run to see if Ron is okay*

    --Cheese Diva
    

    HARRY: "C'mon, Hermione, we've got to get out of here! Voldemort   could be behind any one of these trees!"

    HERMIONE: *thinking* Why does Harry   always have to save me? I'm destined to be with Ron, and everyone knows it. Why   can't he save me just once?!?!

    --Kristen
    

    Hemione: "Harry... it... can't... be!!!"

    Harry: "It's worst than   dementors!!!"

    Hermione and Harry: (in unison) "HARRY AND HERMIONE SHIPPERS!!!   AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

    --Pheonixqueen121
    

    Harry: "Oh no, H/H-ers!"

    Hermione: (screaming) "Go away, you sick   people! I like Ron, do you hear?! RON!!!!"

    Harry: (thinking) "It's about   time! There's no away that she can deny it if we survive." (smiles)

    --Ana
    

    Newsreader voice-over:

    "Ladies and Gentlemen, this shocking new   picture from the next Harry Potter film has led to the expanding heads of many a   H/Hr shipper, all 0.01 % of them. However as the other 99.99% of the population   know it will never happen, the new mantra is, 'JK said they are strictly   platonic.' Use this for all times when the thought of H/Hr invades your   thoughts. Goodnight."

    --Becky
    

    *Hermione's sleeping and having a nightmare* Hermione: *sleeptalking*   "No, H/H, no, H/H!! Ahhhhhh, no H/H!!!"

    Ron: "HERMIONE!"

    *Ron shakes   Hermione awake*

    Hermione: "Huh? What? Oh... it was just a dream... thank   goodness!"

    *Kisses Ron on the lips*

    Ron: "Huh?"

    Hermione: "Oh, isn't it   obvious, Ron?"

    *Ron grins*

    --Heather
    

    Hermione: "Harry, I'm really scared!"

    Harry: "Me, too, Hermione.   But we're Gryffindors, remember? We have got to be brave!"

    Hermione: "But   they're everywhere! And they keep saying, Harry and Hermione Forever! It   is so disgusting!"

    Harry: "You're telling me! Don't they know that you and   RON are meant to be together?!"

    Hermione: "You are so right, Harry! By   Merlin, these H/Hr shippers. They are so sadly deluded!"

    Harry: "It's a pity,   really. You'd think that St. Mungo's would be more careful about letting their   guard down...."

    --SkittellGirl
    

    Hermione: (under her breath) "Oh no! Not with Harry here! Ron, you   lovable dummy!"

    Harry: "What does that say? Ron loves who?",br> Hermione:   (trying to rush Harry away) "It says Ron loves Fleur! Let's get out of   here!"

    Harry: (thinking) "Funny, I could have sworn it started with an   H..."

    --Daniel
    

    Harry: (Grabs Hermione away from Ron while they are snogging madly)   "It's for your own good, Ron! You two have to come up for air   sometime!"

    Hermione: (panting) "Forget that!" (pant, pant) "Who needs air   anyway?!" (Pushes Harry down and runs back to snog Ron again)

    --Ruth
    

    Harry: "Ron! Don't be so angry..."

    Ron: "How could you do this to   me, Harry? I thought you were my friend!"

    Hermione: "No Ron! It's   not..."

    Harry: "I'm just trying to protect her from Voldemort!"

    Ron: "I   know! But those stupid H/H shippers just don't understand it so leave her to me,   Harry!"

    Harry: "Look Ron, I agree but I'm the hero, so I have to protect   someone..."

    Ron: "I don't care about your reputation! I can't let people   think you love her!"

    Hermione: "Well... We're not in love! Ron, I love you!   Please don't be mad..."

    Ron: "I know but some people just don't understand   it!"

    Hermione: "We just have to use a different method." *kisses   Ron*

    Harry: "That's better!"

    --Lily
    

    Hermione: (suddenly) "Hey, what are we doing in the middle of a   random forest, anyway?"

    Harry: *shrugs* "Beats me. It's all Alfonso's   fault."

    Hermione: "Poor thing must've been held captured against his will,   then brainwashed by the Pumpkin Pie Crew..."

    --Gigaku
    

    Harry: "Oh no! A camera!"

    Hermione: "Harry, what are you doing?   We're not doing anything wrong!"

    Harry: "But... evidence!"

    Hermione: "What   evidence? Let go of me!"

    Harry: "We can't create H/H evidence!"

    Hermione:   "Don't be stupid! Who would want to believe that?"

    Harry: "You never know,   Hermione..."

    --Amy
    

    Hermione: "What on Earth are you doing, Harry?!?!"

    Harry: "Well,   I'm saving you from that dementor, you ungrateful beast... I believe he was   trying to suck your soul out through your mouth!"

    Hermione: You MORON! That   was Ron in a sweatshirt! We were making out, for crisake!"

    Harry:   "Erm....."

    Hermione: *clamps hands over mouth* "Ehh... I did not just say   that..."

    --jyllie
    

    Hermione: "Harry, let go! If this gets on the internet we're   dead!"

    Harry: "Yeah, you know what will happen. The H/Hr fans will go mad   with joy only to be let down when you and Ron get together."

    Hermione: "And   all the R/hr fans will go into a rampage and start hurting people... Hey, what   do you mean, when Ron and I get together?"

    Harry: "Um... I think I'll leave   now."

    --Kat097
    

    Uncharacteristic and disgusting pink jacket: $20

    Weird and   disturbing rainbow belt: $5

    Hair curlers to stop usual frizz: $15

    Ron's   face if he saw this: Priceless.

    There are some thing Pumpkin Pie-ers can only   dream, for everything else there's Mastercard...

    --Izzy
    

    (Harry, Ron, and Hermione looking down on the cursed   picture)

    Harry: "I hate Cuaron."

    Hermione: "Yeah, me too. Sheesh, and he   thinks I actually like you in THAT way?!"

    Ron: "Yeah, he has to bloody   re-read Book Five and look closely in Book Six!"

    --Pheonixqueen121
    

    Harry: "Don't worry, Hermione, I'll keep you safe from all those H/H   shippers."

    Hermione: "That's very nice, Harry, but I would prefer it if Ron   were doing this. RON, MY DARLING, HELP ME!!"

    Ron: "ARRRGH, THEY'VE GOT   ME!!"

    Hermione: "Oh, no! Harry, don't just stand there, help him!" (throws   Harry into the mob of H/H shippers)

    --Stephanie
    

    Hermione: "Let me go, Harry!"

    Harry: "Hermione, calm down. Ron is   only going to get something in the common room."

    Hermione: "Nooooooo!! Come   back, my love!"

    --Ailene90
    

    Hermione: "No, let me go!"

    Harry: "No way,   Hermione!!"

    Hermione: "And why NOT?!"

    Harry: "Because you're not supposed   to snog Ron until SEVENTH year! You hear me?! SEVENTH!"

    --Gigaku
    

    Hermione: "LET GO OF ME!"

    Harry: "I can't, Draco put a binding   curse on us and now I am stuck to you."

    Hermione: "Then get Draco to take it   off."

    Harry: "Draco's not here, Ron's beating him up for being an H/H   shipper."

    Hermoine: "I can't blame him, beat one up myself last   week."

    Ron: (running towards them) "It's okay, guys, I have the   countercurse." (thinking) "I'll pay Harry 20 galleons if he'll bind me and   hermione like that...."

    --Natalie Potter
    

    Ron: "Harry!!!! Save my GIRLFRIEND!!!!"

    Harry: "Huh...   girlfriend... who?"

    Hermione: "Damn... I told him not to tell anyone   yet..."

    --Seansgurl315
    

    Hermione: "I bet those H/Hr shippers are jumping around seeing   this..."

    Harry: "I bet... but those crazy fools do not know what's really   happening... 'cause they refuse to see..."

    --Seansgurl315
    

    Hermione: "LET ME GO THIS INSTANT OR I'LL HEX YOU INTO THE NEXT   MILLENIA!!!"

    Harry: "No, Hermione! I can't let you do this..."

    Hermione:   "I'M GONNA KILL HER AND THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO TO STOP ME!!!"

    Harry:   "Chill out, Hermy, she only asked him what our Transfiguration homework   was..."

    Hermione: "Who would ask RON for homework??? STUPID LAVENDER WAS   HITTING ON MY RONNIKEINS!!!"

    --T. Waters
    

    Ron: "Professor Lupin! A boggart! A terrible, despicable   boggart!"

    (Professor Lupin rushes in and gags as he sees what's in front of   him!)

    Lupin: "Oh... God... too... wrong...."

    (Hearing his colleauge   struggling for dear life, Dumbledore rushes in!)

    Dumbledore: "I do hope   that's a boggart, else I've lost 20 galleons and a pair of socks in the twins'   'When will ickle Ronniekins and Mione get it on' pool!"

    (Harry and Hermione   rush in, having been doing something very platonic somewhere else!)

    Harry:   "Nice jumper, Hermione."

    Hermione: "Shut up! And get your hands off me, you   perv!"

    (Dobby rushes in, because he can only add to the insanity!)

    Dobby:   "Harry Potter sir, why is you hugging the girl, sir? You knows she is destined   to be with Harry Potter's greatest friend!"

    Boggart: "Bloody hell, this is   too creepy even for me! I'm going to go scare a witch in Australia with a   headless sheep!"

    Everyone: "Phew!"

    --Izzy